GIVING UP!...
Monday, April 12, 2010
People always look at me as a GO-GETTER,DRIVEN,CONFIDENT,(SOMETIMES OVER-CONFIDENT), n NEVER ONE TO GIVE UP EASILY....
Guess what ppl, i m non of that now... u saw that rite!! ah huh... I,SHARNIYA JAYAPRAKASH, AM GIVING UP SLOWLY IN LIFE.
I have just lost the gist for life.I give up always having to be Number 1 even though i dun want to.
I give up trying to stand on my own two fucking feet even if u dun wan me to.
I give up trying to think of my own Fucking life, even though u think u have a better authority to fucking plan my life. I give up trying to find love again, knowing how hopeless i am in love.
I give up trying to, Yes trying to kiss (him) without having to think about (your) lips on mine.Yes i give up trying to hug only (him) and not having to picture ur fucking face there! I give up thinking how hopeless i have become.
Do u know my heart yearns for u? Do u atleast know the reason y i date many men n cant seem to settle with one? Do u know how heavy my heart is rite now? I've tried & I've tried all these while to find someone to replace you, but I've finally realise no-one will ever replace you..cos I love you.
Its a lie when i tell ppl i dun miss you, Cos i do. Its a lie when i tell others i hate you, cos I LOVE YOU. Its a lie when i ppl ask me if i ever think abt u, cos i actually do think about u all the time.!
U caused so much of pain n sufferings to me, i hate u for doing all that to me. For putting me thru so much of trauma. I just wanted u to noe the pain i went thru. That was y i fucking took revenge on u! When i saw the pain on ur face, when my revenge finally struck hard on u, i swear i wanted to hold u tight, n tell u everything's gonna be alright! But it was too late, i wish i cld go back in time to mend the spaces that was created between us!
I miss ur lips on mine, the way u kiss me passionately n just hold me in ur arms n jus look into my eyes!
I miss ur touch, everytime i fall asleep in ur arms n wake up on ur chest hearing ur heart go thump thump Bump!
I miss the times u hug me from the back n jus hold me in place n ask me to look at the moon.
I miss the times u n i fight terribly n then make out later on n say sorry till we sleep.
I miss the times u used to "kidnap" me to ur room n slowly torture me.
Do u miss me the same way i miss u!? i bet not...cos u've obviously moved on, i guess i m a fool to be holding on to something that never was mine in the first place. I've got so many questions in my head, Wat made u behave like an ass? Wat made u force me in bed? Wat made u cheat on me? When i meant so much to u, yet u shattered my heart into tiny pieces? Y am i even writing this?
Today i realised one thing, I still love u, for some reason, i still hold on to our memories. 4yrs n still counting on.
bid goodbye and fly away... 10:57 AM
: Whispers of the World :
: About the Girl :
My name is Ryeana Jayaprakash but i am also known as Rina Jaya.
I am a fun person to be wth always one to think of others before putting myself first! A great friend all would love to have but dont get on my bad books! Nah.. you wun like it!
I am a preschool teacher and absolutely loving my job!
Add me on msn if you wish to know me more, at shreena_jaya@hotmail.com,
if not msn, email me at shreena_jaya@yahoo.com.
Love to Chill out wif my F.R.I.E.N.D.S * Loves ChocA & ice CREAM* Loves Music * Loves Dancing*Loves ma enemies * Joker* Bubbly * Notti all the time* Crazy * Alluring * Angelic * Appealing * Beauteous * Graceful * Ideal * Lovely...awww...* Magnificent * Marvelous * Nice* Stunning * Sublime * Superb * Symmetrical * Stunning * Charming...wheeeee.. * Cute =p * Dazzling * Enticing * Exquisite * Fair * Fascinating * Refined * Resplendent * Splendid * Tantalizing * Teaser* Wonderful * Funky * straight forward
Thats about me...wanna know me more drop me an email.
Thank you for viewing my profile. Take care and have a lovely day/night!
Cheerios,
Sharniya a.k.a Rina
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